How to write an obituary: a simple guide with examples
TL;DR
An obituary does three jobs: it tells people that someone has died, it gives a short picture of who they were, and it says where and when people can say goodbye. A good one is usually between 150 and 400 words. You don't need to be a writer. You need the facts, a few true details and some quiet time.
An obituary does three jobs: it tells people that someone has died, it gives a short picture of who they were, and it says where and when people can say goodbye. A good one is usually between 150 and 400 words. You don't need to be a writer. You need the facts, a few true details and some quiet time.
What to include
Most obituaries follow the same order, which helps readers find what they're looking for:
- The announcement: full name, age, where they lived, and the date they died.
- A short life story: where they were born, their work, their family, what they loved.
- Family: the people they leave behind, and sometimes those who died before them.
- Service details: the date, time and place of the funeral or memorial, or a note that it will be private.
- A final line: where to send flowers or donations, or a short thank you.
Start with the facts
The first sentence can be simple:
Ona Kazlauskienė, 84, of Kaunas, died peacefully at home on 3 March, surrounded by her family.
You don't have to say how someone died. Many families choose not to, and that's fine.
Then the person
This is the part people remember. Instead of listing qualities ("she was kind and generous"), give one or two small, true details that show them:
She worked as a nurse for forty years and never stopped checking on her neighbours. Her apple cake was famous on the whole street, and she never once shared the recipe.
Ask family members for one memory each. You'll quickly see which details feel most like the person.
Family
List the closest family first: husband or wife, children, then grandchildren, brothers and sisters. You can name everyone or keep it short ("she leaves her two sons, five grandchildren and many friends"). Be careful with spelling. Names are the thing people check first.
Service details
Give the day, date, time and full address. If you're unsure of details yet, it's fine to write "a memorial service will be announced later" and update it.
Tone
There's no single right tone. Some obituaries are formal, some are warm and even funny, if that fits the person. Write the way you would talk about them to someone who never met them.
A short example
Jonas Petraitis, 1941 to 2026
Jonas Petraitis of Klaipėda died on 14 May at the age of 85. He was born in a village near Telšiai, the youngest of six, and worked at the port for more than thirty years.
Jonas loved the sea, crossword puzzles and long Sunday lunches with his family. He could fix almost anything, and usually did, whether you asked him to or not.
He is survived by his wife of 58 years, Aldona, his daughters Rasa and Daiva, and four grandchildren. The funeral will be held on Saturday, 16 May, at 11:00 at St. Joseph's Church, Klaipėda.
Newspaper or online?
A newspaper notice is often short because it's priced by the word. An online memorial page has no word limit, so you can keep the notice short and put the fuller story, photos and service details in one place people can return to. Vibitely's In Memory of lets you fill in their details and your own notes, writes their story from those notes for you to edit, and it's free to create and share.
Take your time. An obituary written with care, even a short one, means a great deal to the people who read it.